Why break a 45-year-long silence?

I waited almost half a century to do this.

It was beginning in 1993, when I returned to Seattle that I began to change with regard to my traditional Democratic Party views on race.

#  I began to notice how many times I was the object of anger, resentment, and hatred from African-Americans, complete strangers who would give me hostile glares or treat me rudely.  Being accosted and then grabbed by the collar by a group of black girls in Westlake Plaza...who would not let go.  Bus-drivers who would refuse to answer a simple yes/no question or who yelled at me ("What are you waiting for?  Get on the bus.").

#  In 200- with the Mardi Gras riots in Pioneer Square, which ended with the death of Kristopher Kime, who was trying to help a young women whom a group of young African-Americans was stomping, I could not overcome my disgust with not only the conduct (or non-conduct) by the Seattle Police Department but the knowledge that something like 75% of the victims were white and 90% of the aggressors were black (or do I have the percentages reversed)?

#  An article in the P.I. several years again in which a African-American community leader criticized African immigrants as being "aggressive" as an explanation for often strained relations between the two groups.  Aggressive because they work really hard?   Hard to understand that one

* Watching the local news one night five years ago and hearing the African-American principal and assistant principal of a South End high school state to the jury that were deliberating over the accusations of rape at the same school, "You know, this may be hard for you to believe, but we are victims as well."  The rape victim's mother was sobbing.

#  The Duke lacross team rape allegations, which riveted the attention of Americans, who were in the end exonerated completely.

#  The denunciation as racists of Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, and Geraldine Ferraro in 2008.

#  The local ouster of several teachers in the Seattle Public Schools, some of whom used a common racial epithet among African-Americans to try to combat their students use of homophobic epithets ("How would you like it if someone called you a n-----.  Well, that's how homosexuals feel when you call them f-----."

#  The deaths in the past five years of James Paroline, the "traffic circle gardener" in Rainier Beach; the beating to death Tuba Man, one afternoon, across from the Seattle Center, by a group of young black juveniles;Manish Melwani by Elijah Hall; Denny Vega; the Lakewood cops shot and killed by Maurice Clemmons;  Dien Huyhn, a Vietnamese Buddhist/scientist whose skull was fractured by blows from a hammer just outside his home in Tacoma:  these wre nor random acts of urban violence.  

They were the actions of individuals who had grown up in a community where violence was the norm.

The local media, the City government, and the police refused to investigate any of these as possible "hate crimes."


Have there been any white-on-black beatings or killings in the past five years?

If a black person had been either beaten or killed by a non-black, it would have in all likelihood prompted protests and media attention locally and nationally.

* * * * *

No, not all African-Americans are criminals.  Far from it.  I never said or intended to say that.  And, yes, there are criminals of every race, ethnicity, religion, socioeconomic group, etc.

But the much higher rates of criminality compared to other groups at the income parity has to be addressed. Even the liberal NPR has stated that one in nine black men under 30 is incarcerated or has been in the past (I know some will say that these are largely for petty drug possession.  I don't really know).

When all is said and done, 93% of African-American murders are by African-Americans.  Violence hits hardest that same community.

What I am saying is that other approaches to the phenomenon of violence within the African-American community need to at least be discussed.

Yes, after all this, I will bury the hatchet and no longer speak publicly on this.  But I will have "said it," not just "thought it."  

On the Americanization of Europe (and the rest of the world as well)

"It's more than a little cliché to describe how terribly difficult it is to move to a foreign country where they don't speak English all the time. But honestly, this borders on downright silly as virtually everyone in Paris speaks English at some level and most visitors hear almost more English than French on the street. There are McDonald's everywhere. The difficulty isn't finding someone who speaks English; it's trying to escape the expanding American cultural dominance abroad."

Very sad.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/books/2018013501_br22paris.html

The big difference one notices between French movies and Quebec movies, besides the accent, is that the latter are so Americanized, with the pumping, adrenalin-filled soundtrack, fast editing, tough talk/explosive action.

* * * * *

We Americans talk big, we ARE big.

And the rest of the world seems compelled to follow suit in our overweening self-importance.

As a middle-aged American woman who used to go to London told me, "When in London, she pretended she was Canadian.  And she avoided Americans--embarrassingly loud, flashy--like the plague.  As I would/do.

Of course, the Chinese are giving the Americans plenty of competition, but I still the latter take the crown for sheer vulgarity, exhibitionism, and narcissism.

No, it is not interesting having to submit to a loud American voice carrying on about the most excruciatingly trivial, banal details of their personal life--plugged into her Ipad-with-microphone walking down the street, oblivious to all but apparently enjoying drawing attention of any kind from strangers.

* * * * *

I think the United States is the epitome of "selling it," i.e., the hyper-capitalism in which people are "sold" from the minute they are born to gleaming grinning toothpaste smiles, Broadway brassiness, Hollywood super-extravaganza, TV commercials, and TV sitcoms.

The charm of this lifestyle, this culture largely escapes me.  Seeing Germans or Chinese, New Zealand-ers or Ethiopians aping cowboys strumming guitars and rasping rap, gospel, or country-and-western is not flattering to them or to "us."

What we have exported in terms values is not only a certain kind of democracy but also a culture where success is measured in terms of sheer bigness:  how much money has the "no. 1" movie made, the size of one's boobs or one's penis, how loud and outrageous one can be (in public), etc.  Something's better because it's bigger, right?

"The Dark Knight" is awesome because there's so much going on, so many buildings and bridges collapsing, it's all about speed and amplitude.  "Lord of the Rings":  WOW, WOW, WOW!!!  All those hobbits and other creatures, millions of them--golly jees--swarming across the screen, all that screaming, all those things and semi-things getting crushed to smithereens!

We didn't invent bad taste but we've taken it to new heights.

I know I am in the minority here, again, but I don't think the exportation of this "model" of humanity is good for the environment, humanistic values...our own souls.

* * * * *

The myths of America are translated world-wide, and the line between myth and reality becomes increasingly fuzzy:   Hollywood; the Cowboy and the Wild West; the Civil Rights movement (much messier and more complicated than what eventually became liberal dogma and story-tale textbook material; the War of Independence (the Boston Massacre resulted in about a dozen or so dead, nowadays a massacre is often much much higher, as at Srebenica, which resulted in 9,000 deaths; only 1/3 of the colonists supported Independence, 1/3 were Tories, 1/3 were neutral, as Richard Hofstadter stated).

* * * * *

Only Americans, Germans, Chinese, Vietnamese, and Mexicans--I know that's probably a lot of humanity--can carry on conversations outside that we can be heard in homes with double-pane glass windows.

My greatest fear is that the French will become Americans.  The Quebecois are already half-American.
Or the Brits become Yanks.

* * * * *

When people of other countries, whether in Europe, the Far East, Russia, etc., give up their own popular cultures (primarily, music, cinema, television, food habits, restaurant chains) for those of the U.S., we are all in trouble.  The "dumbing-down" effect of American television has been shown to have correlation with the declining test scores, mindless consumerism, etc.

It's bad enough that if one goes to Boston or San Francisco, one finds the same stores as one would find in Seattle (Macy's, Target, etc.).  What if one went to Tokyo or Buenos Aires and all one could find were only Target, MacDonald's, Wal-mart, Pottery Barn, etc.?

* * * * *

America's adulation of "tough-guy"-style violence is exported all around the world.  One has only to look at Quebec, where the television serials resemble so totally American ones.  But if one looks further, as in the Far East, gangsters, game shows, variety shows, sitcoms abound.

When one goes to the site of the beautiful, calming Belgian "Jardins et Loisirs" website in order to look at segments from previous broadcasts and selects one, one is bombarded with a typically American 12-second commercial explosion hawking Coca-Cola, the rhythm-and-blues soundtrack at decibels guaranteed "to knock your socks off" (cliche intentional).

http://www.rtbf.be/tv/emission/detail_jardins-loisirs?id=36

* * * * *

The qualities  that American culture brought to the world--the entrepreneurial, optimistic, future-oriented outlook--can also be weaknesses:  They go hand in hand with the inability and/or strong disinclination to look beneath surface appearances, to accept the human condition, the belief in material progress and in undisguised rampant consumerism as a panacea. for all.

The racism lesson #2: recounted by one person of col...

I find it noteworthy that people will be flummoxed when I tell them that I have much more discrimination from African-Americans than whites.  I didn't realize until I interacted with African immigrants, especially those from East Africa and the Caribbean, that blacks were not primarily hostile, resentful, and very angry.  This was a pleasant shock.

Now I can hear certain liberals cry out:  "He must be a racist troll."

Maybe this is what results when so many people believe that African-Americans, because of U.S. history, cannot be racist--there are plenty of sanctions against openly acting in a racist way against black people but when black people say racist things or behave in a prejudiced manner against whites, Hispanics, Asians, there is at best "sideways glances" but mostly silence.

I have forgotten, or more accurately, repressed by memories of the attacks I was the object of during my childhood.  I do recall listening to a friend, Wendy W., whose father was a teacher in the Seattle Public Schools and who lived in Montlake, say once to me, "You know, I understand blacks have been discriminated against, but I'm really afraid of them."   I said nothing, even though I had already been beaten up several times.  My feelings were just too boxed up inside.

I waited almost a lifetime to tell the following story.

The most terrific beating I received occurred just right outside of Ezell's Fried Chicken in 1968 at about 2:00 p.m.  I think it was the summer, though I could be mistaken.   I was alone and waiting for the bus when suddenly a group of African-American kids came running out of nowhere and started pummeling me.  I probably fell to the sidewalk--I recall my books fell on the sidewalk and at the end of the ordeal, a young black girl helped me collect them.  I might have been crying.  In any case, I was very very shaken.  The beating must have lasted 5-10 minutes.   I don't recall what kind of bruises resulted from it, but I do not think I sustained any major physical injury of any sort

I didn't think of going to Garfield High School, right across, the street to report the beating.  All I wanted to do was to get away and nurse my injuries in mute silence.

I assumed afterwards that this kind of incident happened all the time in the Central Area, which may indeed have been the case for years.   Hundreds of students were probably assaulted and tacitly told to "say nothing."

No one ever suggested that these beatings be reported.  It was as if the underlying premise was that African-Americans were free to do whatever they wanted.  Whenever I pass by Garfield or Ezell's today I inevitably think for a second about the assaults.  But no, I don't get flashbacks.

The main result was that I had psychologically traumatized for life.

Today much of my distress comes from the fact that people will not acknowledge what I went through.  It's as if a whole part of Seattle history had become anesthetized and fallen into oblivion.  This really happened--to ME!  I did not deserve to be treated like a dog being beaten.

And I believe it happened to many others, and that they were implicitly told to not say anything about it.

I am also concerned that people in their twenties or thirties (or even forties) will have been indoctrinated with the very entrenched, fixed "story-line" set by a dominant group of Seattle liberals at the expense of a much more complicated, messier "story-line."

And even if very few people ever people will have read this, I will have by setting this down have done service to the truth of my own experience.  I don't think I can ever "exorcise" the trauma of having all those fists, arms, shoes, angry faces on my body.

But I do believe I can "release" some of its effects.  Or hoping that I can.  Regardless of who reads or never reads this. I never wanted any of this to happen, I wanted to forget this, and I was a reluctant witness to history.

My previous review of Yelp

"The contribution of Yelp was to combine a model of the '60's television game shows with the Internet, Consumer Reports, fraternity hazing, the former regime of Hosni Mubarak, and a series of Chinese boxes."    (2020 HBS Review?).

Yelp has given you a box to review "your things" in.  Now it is time to think outside of the box.

Write inside the box, think outside of it.

* * * * *

My review of Yale University was removed on 4/13/12 because it was "not primarily relevant to a consumer experience."  

Consumer experience.

Does that mean I needed to have eaten at the Snack Bar?

Be enrolled for at least one semester?  Worked there?  Be a neighbor of the institution?  Walked across the campus twice?

I did visit the campus and apply as an undergraduate but no, I did not try to buy Yale University.  Nor did my daddy try to buy my way into it.

I do believe my review is particularly relevant to many consumers, namely, those tens of thousands of applicants each year who are not admitted and bypassed in favor of those with much weaker academic records.

Consumers of the frequently chaotic and sometimes idiotic billion-dollar industry of college admissions.

As I said before, if you can't literally "eat it," smash it with a hammer, or take it out of a shopping bag, Yelp don't want you to review it.

* * * * *

Yelp:  the reviewer's paradise for consumer goods and services.  But it is so afraid of diversity and the "marketplace of ideas" (yes, hypocrisy and social problems do exist) that it practices censorship.  

Yet it more than tolerates four-letter words and profanity.

And possible "improprieties" as well:

"...has found many instances of http://Yelp.com sales people calling restaurants and, for a price, offering to move negative reviews down on the page."

http://techcraver.com/...
http://www.wekidyounot...

* * * * *

"Satiric" and "snarky" are two adjectives frequently used to describe the reviews on Yelp.

Yet my review of The Stranger (4/10/12) was removed because in my review decried the open use of racial slurs by this newspaper.  The parody and satire in my review--I modeled myself after the writing style of The Stranger itself--obviously hit a raw nerve in the reflexes of the "Support" Team.

The stern warning I got from them NOT to write additional updates of  I think was directly lifted from government censors in the People's Republic of China.  O.K., an exaggeration, but we're all Americans, so no big deal, right?

"They keep pulling our site down as fast as we can get it back up running."

* * * * *

Better reams of superficiality, shallowness, and jokes than truth spoken from the heart, brain, and guts, I am assuming.

Guidelines?
"Political or historical references, analogies, metaphors, satirical touches, quotations from cultural luminaries, and words that no one can pronounce are frowned upon.  On the other hand, scatological humor, obscenities, cliches, pet stories, profanity, grammatical mistakes, the absence of punctuation, misspelled words, and--above all--political correctness (but no politics!) are entirely welcome."

* * * * *

What is the annual net revenue?  How many tens of millions does the CEO make?  How many employees does it have?   Is it publicly traded?  How does Yelp make money (and stay in business)?  What is the actual power structure?  Who is using whom?

I am assuming Yelp's support team will soon inform me that they had to remove this review because "it lacks a primary first-hand consumer experience."  Did I need to visit their main office in S.F. and/or talk with a Yelp staff person by phone or email (an impossibility)?  If this is the case, I am assuming Yelp should remove another 3,000 reviews.

This IS all and nothing else but my "first-hand consumer experience of Yelp."

* * * * *

Where is the non-Yelp?   (Google are you listening?).

Yelp "Talk"

http://www.yelp.com/topic/seattle-is-there-another-site-besides-yelp-where-one-can-write-reviews-of-businesses-and-other-organizations


4/17/12

Lily "The Rebel" H. says:
Is there another site besides Yelp you know of where one can write reviews of businesses and other
organizations?

Elite '12
 Michael "Snarky and Aloof" K. says:
Angie's List - you have to pay to do it though


Elite '12
Corinne "Rinney" K. says:
City search


Elite '12
Corinne "Rinney" K. says:
Google has reviews too


Elite '12
Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
What sorts of organizations?


Elite '12
Kate "Sweetwater" S. says:
Start a blog


Lily "The Rebel" H. says:
Someone's making money--perhaps A LOT--off our backs.  We are the writers who keep it going from day to day.  Yelp needs a competitor.  Its censorship/filtering/removal worries me.  Have no idea what perks
Yelp elites get, but I bet it isn't that much.

Who are the stockholders of Yelp?   How much does the CEO make?

Elite '12
Kate "Sweetwater" S. says:

There are plenty competitors -- as already mentioned Google, CitySearch, UbranSpoon, etc all have
similar review models. Yelp obviously does it better -- especially when it comes to the community
aspect.

Ask any Elite and yeah, we'd agree with you. They are partially running their company based off our
reviews -- so what? We came into this knowing that fact.
Your reviews are getting removed because they do not comply with the Terms of Service. Which hey, guess
what? Every website has. This isn't a North Korean regime like you imply

Elite '12
Tom "King of the Gravy Stain" B. says:
Yeah, if you run the blog, you control the ad revenue stream.


Elite '12
Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
@Lily: You seem to be stuck on a particular narrative, I agree that a blog would be much more suited to
shoehorning your strong opinions on black-on-white violence and affirmative action into the guise of a
"review".

Elite '12
Kristin C. says:
Nobody is making you write on Yelp.
+1 to Terms of Service. They are pretty straight forward, and since Yelp is basically self-monitored by
Elites and other Users, you can get away with a lot more than you can at other websites. Believe me, I
do it for a living.


Elite '12
Jeff "Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow" G. says:
Yelp doesn't conscript users. This an all volunteer army. If someone objects to their reviews being
used without compensation then this is the wrong place to be reviewing.

Elite '12
Kate "Sweetwater" S. says:
*waves at Kristin*
I work with her, we know what we are talking about when it comes to TOS
& +1 Chris * Jeff


Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
Yeah, re-reviewing the same places over and over again just to add irrelevant racist and paranoid
tantrums isn't exactly what Yelp's all about.


Elite '12
 Jeff "Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow" G. says:
I just read a bunch of your rants(reviews). You definitely need a blog. The way you shoehorn your
agendas into reviews is very awkward.

Elite '12
Kristin C. says:
She does have a blog. It just happens to be all of the reviews Yelp removed.

http://lilliansblog-d....


Elite '12
14 hours ago George G. says:
I like that word - shoehorn.
Flag as inappropriate Send Compliment   Send Message

Elite '12
Jeff "Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow" G. says:
Interesting blog...She should be paying Yelp a royalty since they own the content of her removed
reviews.

Elite '12
Joshua B. says:
It would be nice to be able to download all my reviews... not for posting somewhere else, but as an
archive. The same way both Facebook and Google now allow you to download all the content you've posted on those sites.

Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
Five years of Metro review updates is just a touch fanatical.

Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
And sweet god that Stranger review is vile.


Elite '12
Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
Sites built around user-generated content are all "curated" to some extent.


Elite '12
"Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow" G. says:
I remember flaging the Stranger review.

Elite '12
Isy "Nines" E. says:
Huhhhhh.... why do I feel so creeped out reading these reviews?
Renaming Queen Anne to Queen Latifah? What exactly....? I can't even formulate a response to the
question.


Elite '12
Jen "Honey Badger" B. says:
I...uh...Think you have issues with being white and are allowing yourself to become a racist, bigot who
is off her fucking rocker. Take your meds or whatever you need to do to stop blaming other people for
your insecurities.

Elite '12
Riss "CheekyMonkey™" J. says:
To answer your actual question, Lily. I think a blog is the best outlet for you to share your views and
write articles, stories or opinions.
Though those other sites mentioned are review sites, they will all have terms of service and be
generally constructed in a set format of the actual experience of the visited business or service, and
not a very easy outlet when you have social/political/etc passions and opinions you are trying to
share.

For the rest of the thread, I don't disagree with any of ya'll, but the number of jerk-ish comments
don't bode well for anyone here. It's pretty obvious what folks think of the reviews, the threads and
opinions of this poster. Do we really need to beat it down word for word thread for thread and also
drag in her separate blog to add fuel to it?

Whatever happened to "If you don't like it, ignore it?"

Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
You can't blame us for wanting a more lively conversation, I assume we're all wildly bored at work.


Elite '12
Shalan "I say, does 'anal-retentive' have a hyphen?" G. says:
I have to agree with the majority here - if you want uncensored outlet for your views and opinions,
your blog is your best bet. My thoughts are that you would be violating a lot of TOS if you choose to
publish your particular chain of thoughts on sites that you don't own.

Having said that, I am sure that Blogger has a TOS too.


Elite '12
Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
@Shalan: http://support.google....


Elite '12
Jen "Honey Badger" B. says:
Yes, I've been in meetings and entering in strings of codes and reading technical documents. I have to
take it out somehow. And when people so bluntly put it out there, they ask for it. I'm not here to be
nice all the time. I tell the truth as I see it.


Elite '12
 Riss "CheekyMonkey™" J. says:
I didn't say be "nice". :P

But I'm not bored at work, so that's probably my problem. ;)

Elite '12
Shalan "I say, does 'anal-retentive' have a hyphen?" G. says:
Thanks Chris - I...uh...Think you have issues with being white and are allowing yourself to become a
racist, bigot who is off her fucking rocker. Take your meds or whatever you need to do to stop blaming
other people for your insecurities.

Elite '12
Nancy H. says:
Sorry, I have no empathy for a racist.

Lily "The Rebel" H. says:
Riss, Thank you for your kind remarks.   I hadn't realized that Seattle was so conformist and intolerant of
certain minority views (and overly tolerant of others) until quite recently.  That said, I am still not
sure what TOS I have violated in my recent reviews.   I am also surprised that people take parody and
satire so literally, as in "auto-da-fe" or "why (some) white men are attracted to Asian women."

Anyway, I do realize now that it is local Elites who police (woops, wrong word, I meant "monitor") the
site for offending reviews.  I acknowledge a certain doggedness in writing updates ("blowing steam")
for certain businesses, I thought, commensurate with the indignation and irritation I feel dealing with
("having contact with") those same businesses.

I had thought there was a "live and let live" esprit here but I was mistaken.  There are many people, I
realize now, who take pleasure in beating down (and ridiculing) other people whose opinions sharply
diverge from their own.  I learned something from this thread.

Again, thank you for principled stance defending civility and tolerance.     -L.

Elite '12
Jim "The 2nd Most Interesting Man in the World" P. says:
What?


Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
Because if you're going for parody or satire you need to make it completely clear that it's parody or
satire. If everyone reads it as racism, you're doing it wrong. We're just interpreting what you write.

Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
You can't just throw around slurs and expect it to count as satire. That's not how it works.

Elite '12
11 hours ago Kate "Sweetwater" S. says:
""Tolerance of intolerance is cowardice."
Being open minded and "tolerant" doesn't mean one turns a blind eye to bigotry. Not all minority ideas
are equal, let alone socially acceptable or right...

Elite '12
Jen "Honey Badger" B. says:
I don't think you all understand, SHE's the minority here being treated unfairly. She's clueless and
playing the victim card. I do take pleasure in showing people how stupid they are. And if you think
you've been "beaten down" with words, grow the fuck up and look what you write.


Elite '12
Shalan "I say, does 'anal-retentive' have a hyphen?" G. says:
Lily "The Rebel" H. says:  "Again, thank you for principled stance defending civility and tolerance.  
-L."

Uh?? I don't think you all understand, SHE's the minority here being treated unfairly. She's clueless
and playing the victim card. I do take pleasure in showing people how stupid they are. And if you think
you've been "beaten down" with words, grow the fuck up and look what you write.
Pardon me for speaking for you Riss, but that's how I took your true, but gentle admonishment.

Elite '12
Kate "Sweetwater" S. says:
Oh, I understand that she is in the minority here. Im just saying an open minded and "tolerant"
person/city/etc doesn't have to accept  every horrible idea ever just for the sake of "tolerance".
People who claim their points are validated because someone is intolerant of their intolerance are
well, a specific sort of group and still fail with their argument.

Lily "The Rebel" H. says:
What?   When the parody is of The Stranger, which to me is racist and throws out epithets like "ass---
-" or "fascist" like freebies at a carnival and is continually  disrespectful of persons or views it
disagrees with?  Using words like "honky," "whitey," and "Chinaman" is deeply offensive.

I don't think I am more or less bigoted than anyone else on this site.

When people call me racist--a deeply personally hurtful word for me--, I am perplexed:  how can I, a
person of color, be a racist?  I who have been beaten up several times, endured slurs, and treated as a second-class citizen?

What do you personally know of racism, those who use the term so liberally?   Did anyone of you
personally live through the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King?

Is anyone NOT a racist?   Or could it be a matter of degree?

Judge not lest ye be judged...

That said, it would have been nice if some of my reviews, those with political or social content--a
minority of my reviews--had been read with a little more attention, thoughtful reflection as to what I
actually said as opposed to what you thought I must be saying, and less of a rush to judgment.

Elite '12
Marc "TwoOhSix" M. says:
Has anyone tried the new bacon croutons?

Elite '12
11 hours ago Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
Question: Are you Lily or Denny?


Elite '12
11 hours ago Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
If you can't even keep one name consistent on your account I'm not really sure anyone can trust that a
person who throws around epithets and racially inciteful language is anything you say you are.


Elite '12
Tom "King of the Gravy Stain" B. says:
I like turtles.

Elite '12
Kristin C. says:
People of minority races can still be considered "racist".
Also, thank you Chris, I couldn't remember that guys name!


Keith "He Loved to Laugh" E. says:
Relax, good people.


Elite '12
Kate "Sweetwater" S. says:
Denny didnt like the Walmarts
Flag as inappropriate Send Compliment   Send Message

Elite '12
Shalan "I say, does 'anal-retentive' have a hyphen?" G. says:
Anybody seen the butter dance - http://www.youtube.com...


Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
Lily - again, it's how we're perceiving your language. If we all agree it sounds racist, chances are it
does. Usually if a bunch of people think there's a problem it's a good bet you should examine your own
work critically.


Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
The whole "it's not me it's ALL IF YOU" stance is both lazy and delusional.

Elite '12
Corinna "Apostrophes" K. says:
*of, damnit.

Elite '12
Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
Another suggestion, you could try posting reviews at your other account http://www.insiderpage... and
if their moderation team isn't paying attention, it'll stick around for longer than we'd have the
patience for.

Lily "The Rebel" H. says:
>>  Jeff, "The way you shoehorn your agendas into reviews is very awkward." <<

You have a point, but I believe your choice of the word "agenda" is loaded in itself.  A person of
color  in the U.S. has to live every day of his or her life, so we are told, with that inescapable
fact.  When s/he picks up a newspaper...wherever s/he goes, there is the question of race lurking.  We
have a black president now.  Race makes the headlines every day.   I'm not sure how we are to avoid the
subject.  And so when I open up a newspaper and see hypocrisy in how racial questions are treated by
various government, civic, media, and other non-profit organizations, I am angry.
So I am not persuaded that I am shoehorning the subject into my reviews.  Race is there for a very good
reason: as a person of color, I am trying to hold accountable those organizations that cover the
subject or at all connected with it.

Definition of racism (Merriam-Webster):
1: a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial

differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race
2: racial prejudice or discrimination

The fact that I speak of race in my reviews does not make me a racist anymore than the fact that you do
not makes you not a racist.

I wish thank all of you for your sincerity, generosity, perspicacity, passion, and carefully reasoned
out reflections on all of the above.

Elite '12
Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
"as a person of color, I am trying to hold accountable those organizations that cover the subject or at
all connected with it."

Pull the other one, Denny. http://www.theroot.com...

Sorry, I don't have any friends of color that post over and over about violence, hate, fear directed at
minorities, then go into a tizzy over the word "cracker", tossing n-bombs at the President in the
process.

You've got issues, see a therapist. If you're looking for people to agree with your bigoted beliefs,
seek the "white pride" organizations that will fulfill your need to be accepted.

I'm still not quite sure whether you're a troll, a nutter, or some combination of the two.


Elite '12
Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
"when I open up a newspaper and see hypocrisy in how racial questions are treated by various
government, civic, media, and other non-profit organizations, I am angry."

That reflects badly on you, man. Anger is always easier than understanding.


Elite '12
Kristin C. says:
Racial prejudice or discrimination? Do you actually read your own "reviews"? Because you are describing
yourself here.


Elite '12
Michael "Snarky and Aloof" K. says:
I don't like white people. They are annoying.


Elite '12
Kristin C. says:
Well, you aren't wrong MK.
Flag as inappropriate Send Compliment   Send Message

Elite '12
8 hours ago Clover "Do Not Hunger Yourself" A. says:
I am about to flag the thread but hope that those Yelp peeps above that I consider to be smart and
somewhat of a friend of mine will consider this: let's just ignore these type of threads. It can't grow
without ire for kindling.

Elite '12
Clover "Do Not Hunger Yourself" A. says:
lastly, I urge you to remove this person from your friend list and flag her (?) profile as I have.
Don't start talking to me about racism, I don't have time for fake internet profile holders to wax
poetic about bullshit all day.

i'd prefer to answer 'what neighborhood should I move to' all day than this.


Elite '12
Jesse "Jessiquah" B. says:
I just came to check here from the PDX Yelp community. She posted the same talk thread there! Shock.
Awe. How is she still a user on Yelp?

Elite '12
Yong "The Duke of Trivialities" L. says:
Hey hey!  Why is everyone flagging my troll account?  ;)

Elite '12
8 hours ago Chris "map mange' ou sans cel" W. says:
You cad!

Lily "The Rebel" H. says
[the following was censored by Yelp while the thread was still active]:

Yes, some of my reviews express great frustration, as well as anger, at the landscape of racial politics,both locally and nationally:  the violence that is a cancer within the African-American community; the hypocrisy of those who only cry "racism!" when the victim is black and the aggressor white and never the other way around; the cowardice of the media to identify the race of a person who has committed a violent crime.

As African-Americans have said, "Race is something they cannot escape, something they live 24/7."   I agree with that, as a person of color but not black.  I, too, experience and am affected by it and have no choice about it.

When certain civic, government, and media organizations do their respective jobs in a slipshod manner or are hypocritical (e.g., The Stranger--it is O.K. to use racial slurs against certain races but not others; we can be tough and even abusive towards others but  others cannot), my reviews have pointed out these things.

Contempt, as encapsulated in the phrase "stupid white men" or "Chinaman" together with resentment and frustration breeds violence.

It is obvious that some people hate my reviews.  They hate them because they strongly disagree with them.  But the hate they speak of is not to be found in my reviews.  It is their own hate, and I think they should "own" it rather than project their own hatred onto me.

This is especially the case as I have personally experienced racial violence repeatedly.  As a child I was punched and kicked by groups of young African-Americans--for no other reason than that I was not black.  Please do not lecture me on racism because you know very little of it except for the dogmas and prejudices that you so blindly accept.

This thread has so many similarities to what I experienced being pounced upon while waiting for the bus in front of Ezell's Fried Chicken and savagely beaten.  I was crawling on the sidewalk, the fists came coming down on me like rain.

When I said to one in the group, "You are racist [for beating me]," he only beat me harder.

Yes, some of you are doing the same thing to me all over again, except with words.

It still hurts but this time I am speaking out instead of remaining silent.

Those who call other people "racist bigots" are often the most bigoted of all.


[At this point Yelp closed the thread and removed my last comment.  At least two comments by Yelp "elites" have disappeared from this thread, one in which the author makes reference to 'nailing from trees' either me, my reviews, or both.   Only Yelp "elites," apparently, get to edit or delete their comments in a Talk thread or to remove a thread in its entirety

In hindsight, it is evident to me who and what these people idolize and imitate].

Liberals...I am one.

I have always counted myself as solidly liberal and a "democratic socialist"--and I still do.

Lately, I have been troubled by "The Stranger"-style liberal who constantly uses profanity and obscenity as a badge of moral courage and cultural sophistication.  "As---'," "fascist," and "awesome" seem to roll out of his/her mouth like nectar out of Hebe's goblet.

Its use of demeaning, ugly racist epithets contributes to violence against white people as well as Asians.   By employing such language as "cracker," "whitey," "Chinaman," "honky," The Stranger endorses the view of white people as oppressors, ridiculous, not worthy of respect, and Asians as less than deserving of respect as a race, more like caricatures of Charlie Chan, Fu Manchu, with the unpleasant associations that the word "Chinaman" implies.

These are the first steps towards the violence and hate directed against whole categories of human beings.

Those who decried George W. Bush's famous--or infamous, depending on how you look at it--"Either you're for us or against us" now seem to have secret admiration for their nemesis insofar as they, too, have adapted that viewpoint in regards to their political and cultural adversaries," i.e., those who don't march in lockstep with their views as regards to, in particular, questions of race, sexuality, and gender.

Surely there is room within a liberal perspective for other "story-lines" about these issues.

Does Jimi Hendrix "belong" only to African-Americans any more than the Enlightenment of the 18th century belong only to Europeans?

The viciousness that I have witnessed in Internet blogs--especially Yelp Talk--raises questions for me of how open-minded and tolerant some liberals actually are.

http://www.yelp.com/topic/seattle-is-there-another-site-besides-yelp-where-one-can-write-reviews-of-businesses-and-other-organizations

If one is critical of certain attitudes, views, and/or behaviors of a specific minority group, does that mean one must be a would-be member of a white supremacy group?  Sounds like GWB again.

I used to be a proud liberal, I still am a liberal, but not so proud anymore.
-

The racism lesson: recounted by one person of color

As a person of color myself*, I feel compelled to ask why it is racist to suggest that the African-American community (churches, civic organizations, schools, etc.)  locally take more action to combat violence within that same community by condemning all violence, physical, emotional, or verbal, including all forms of bullying.

Community leaders have to step to the plate to do more for their own communities:  they have the most influence.  Municipal police have very little credibility obviously, as does the municipal government.

This has nothing directly to do with the color of one's skin or race per se.  It does all to do with culture.  I have rarely felt intimidated or threatened by African or Caribbean immigrants.  Or (dark-skinned) Indians or Southeast Asians.  I suspect violent crime is very low within these demographic groups.

Why is it racist to make this assertion?

Statistics aside, when was the last time a non-black person assaulted (or killed) a black person?

Why is it racist to ask this question?

Statistics as part of the discussion, why is it perfectly legitimate to using them when utilizing them to decry higher poverty rates and lower levels of educational achievement among African-Americans, and Hispanics to a somewhat lower extent but NOT appropriate to look at wildly disproportionate rates of violent crime among this same group?

Is it possible that there are multiple causes to the higher crime rate other than slavery and institutional racism, such as poor role models, macho behaviors among males, non-existent family planning, and most of all "the blame game," i.e., it's Hispanics who are stealing our jobs in California, Asians who cheat us, Jews who own all the wealth, etc.?

Why do some people think it is O.K. to use violence against those who openly ask these questions and look for answers?

If not now, then when?

History can be used in many ways, one of which is to justify maladaptive, destructive patterns of behavior.**


* who had African-American teachers in kindergarten and in the third grade and who was once befriended in a time of great isolation in college by one of the kindest and gentlest persons he has ever met, an African-American  librarian, Mr. Morton.

** (This was done, for example, by Lenin and the Bolshevik party to define "class enemies" and rid Russia of its feudal system).

"If something should happen to me..." and Bullying

I'm not taking any chances, so...


If anything should happen to me in the next few days, weeks, or months, please investigate Yelp for direct implication or indirect involvement in the attack, which results in bodily harm, trauma, or even death.


Anything is possible in a world where people are unenlightened.

And these guys and gals don't necessarily pretend ("nailing to trees").

"But I never told you to KILL him, did I?"

They will try to remove incriminating threads and comments (in "Talk"), which will have disappeared into "a black hole" the same way that reviews which are not "relevant to a primary consumer experience," in their "bot" language, do.

Someone or ones are "stalking" me on the Internet, which means that they are rummaging through all and everything to secure personal information about me.  For what purposes, I cannot say with certainty, but "retaliation" seems very probable.

The sound of a voice, body language and behavior, the language, the way one treats others...all reveal a lot about who one is (and who others are).  There is much that does not meet the eye or ear, of course, and for that the past offers clues.

There is movie documentary out entitled "Bully," which though I haven't seen it yet would appear to be "must viewing" by both children and adults (after all children who are bullies develop into adults...who are usually the same bullies, too, just in adult bodies.

http://itsybitsysteps.com/bully-r-rated-movie-kids-should-see/

Adults should lead the way by NOT being bullies themselves.   Unfortunately, that requires a lot of self-reflection, some of it painfully difficult and guilt-ridden.

Young men watch films like "The Dark Knight," in my opinion, to try to deal with the intense fear(s) they feel inside, i.e, they project their fears externally as "a handle" in dealing with the difficulty of stuffing down the fear.   If they could be guided to look inside, where the deepest, most intimate fears, are, there would be much less bullying and violence in this world.

There is so much fear in Seattle, and hostility and anger are the external defenses we use to deal with fears that would otherwise be crippling.  Watching violent films validates the fears we have that men are told they must not admit to having.  After all, everyone gets a vicarious thrill ride watching waves of gratuitous violence spilling over the movie screen.  And guess what?   No one will accuse us of being "weak," no one is alone in the fear.  We all are "screaming our guts out."

Gals like to "come along for the ride," it makes guys feel "brave."

And the game continues.  Till we have to void that fear again, by watching a "scary" film.

For African-American men, the group with the highest incidence per capita of violent crime, the fears must be especially intense, and the "game" the most dangerous of all.  Within their community it seems to me there are few voices advocating non-violence or the dictum that a man should be judged not by how many other men he can "take on," or "how big" he is, but how much he can contribute to the betterment of the lives of other creatures in the universe.

(Physically) dominating others, puffing one's chest out ("having pride") has become a measure has become the "yardstick" here.   There seems to be some confusion between pride and arrogance.   One can have humility and self-pride at the same time.

There also appears to be some disconnect between the pain someone is inflicting on another and whatever the aggressor is feeling, as if s/he had "no idea what the other person was feeling at the time I kicked him/her repeatedly in the head."   It seems apparent that the attacker is too involved in "acting out" and feeling his/her own feelings to "have the time to bother about what the other person (= object)" is feeling.

The bully under these circumstances also seems to be saying, "Cry out, and I'll beat the living hell out of you.  Tell anyone, and I'll really 'get you.'"

I know this:  this happened to me the day after the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr..  Seattle Public Schools were in such a state of disorder--as was most of big urban America--I estimate 700-1,000 non-black students were assaulted in the hallways, bathrooms, grounds of the middle school I went to.

We were kicked in the stomach and beaten with fists.  Outdoors groups of roving young black students used the handles of their umbrellas to hit the Asian and white students (there not being a significant population of Hispanics in Seattle at the time).   I was more frightened than seriously hurt, as I recall.  Nothing was said in the local community or even in my family.

In the next year I was also beaten up by groups of young African-Americans on at least two other occasions.   One was right outside Garfield High School, in front of Ezell's Fried Chicken, as I was waiting for the public bus.  A group ran towards me and started to punch, kick, and knock me to the ground.  The assault lasted for between 5-10 minutes.  Only one bystander did anything to help, a young black girl who helped me to pick up my books.

Again, the incident was met with silence, if not outright disbelief.   African-Americans were collectively all victims and martyrs.  But my experience of them was quite different:   angry, violent, unruly, disrespectful of others.

It apparently was a pretty common kind of incident and I, thus, had nowhere to turn to.

Half a century later, I am dismayed that the same mentality exists, "Talk/tell anyone about your fear and hurt that day and the days and the weeks that followed, and we'll really kick your ass."

"Talk about the race riots and you're a racist."  This is Seattle of the past half century.  Willed collective amnesia.  And the rest of the country?    Who really knows, but I think...

I am not the bravest person I know.  Far from it.  Or the most talented.  Again, I can't begin to enumerate the number of brilliant people I've met in my lifetime to whom my own intellectual wherewithal, interpersonal skills, entrepreneurial ability pale.

To this day I am puzzled why in the historical accounts of the era, almost no mention is made whatsoever of the race riots.  African-Americans are always portrayed as the victims.  There were other victims, of other races.

I waited for the day someone would step forward and talk about the riots, assuming everyone knew about them but just did not want to recall the ugliness of what happened.  It never happened.

The memories are buried there, though, in the cells of our brains and muscles and tissues of our organs.  They say:  I am afraid and will not venture out.  This is as much as I can bear to recall.  There is no one willing to listen.  And I am afraid as well that I will be condemned for having these memories and thoughts.

The silence inside my head is deafening.  The silence outside is absolute.  Or so I think.

Fear as an instrument of domination and control is actually fairly effective.  Fear of feeling fear!  You don't even have the right to your fear.  You have to deny it even exists.  And beneath:  a buried child, buried alive.



* * * * *

Some basic moral values are not being taught in the families these persons came from, for whatever reason.  Blaming others ("society" or other racial/religious/etc. groups for oneself not having taken the responsibility to ensure that one's offspring receive the best possible education and ethical awareness is reprehensible, in my opinion.  No relativism here.

The Swiss psychologist Alice Miller's "Thou Shalt Be Not Aware," published about 30 years ago, is instructive in this regard.  It takes commitment and a lot of effort to be aware.

* * * * *

What about a moratorium not just on racist/sexist/homophobic/ageist language but also violence?

We as a society have ambivalence to violence:  it sells movie tickets, (some) gym memberships, gun sales, cable subscriptions, comedy acts, hate-mongering of every political persuasion.   We tolerate it and in many cases are fascinated/transfixed/entertained by it.

Violence is actually an easy way out.   Yell at someone.  Buy a gun.  Learn to sucker-punch someone in the head, if everyone else knows how.

Non-violence is infinitely more difficult.  Maybe a new definition of "being a man" would be both practical and ethical.

Do men who are violent ever really "conquer" or confront their fears?   They make think they do...

For some young males*, "smacking others around" (maybe a sucker-punch, too) is literal; for others, it is figurative.




* Now I could be accused of gender-bias, I realize.

* * * * *

http://itsybitsysteps.com/4-2-m-settlement-for-student-paralyzed-by-bully/

It didn't have to happen but it did  happen.  We are all responsible for the community we live in, no exceptions.
Responsibility versus blame, now there is a fine line, I am thinking.

Kids who learn that they can get away with, "I don't like what you're saying,  so I'm going to hit/beat you,
grow up into adults who do the same thing ("I don't like your views, so I have the right to bludgeon you") and parent their children in like fashion.  Racism is no excuse for violence, now that is radical, especially for a city as timid (afraid) as Seattle.

The truth is best defended by non-violence.  Those who use violence in defense of the (their) truth betray that very truth they are so ardent about defending.

* * * * *

Holding specific government, civic, religious, media, etc. organizations responsible for the objectivity or lack thereof, ethical behavior, as well for the way they are performing their own self-declared functions is important.  No amount of blogging in general terms can replace the monitoring by ordinary citizens of what is happening in "the marketplace(s) of ideas."  Reviews were posted on Yelp expressly for that purpose.

It is obvious that Yelp has purely commercial motives for everything it does.  Ethics obviously is a secondary consideration.  As long as it's not illegal...and if we can make more money doing X, Y, or Z..."What's ethics gotta do with it, do with it?"  As in, if it doesn't bring me additional profit, why do it?

* * * * *

It also seems self-evident that society itself has an ambivalent attitude towards bullying and violence, not only because of a culture that identifies masculinity with macho-ism (and places a premium on those who embody the ideal) but also because we as spectators, in the movies, on television, in books, in Internet gaming, and often in spectator sports, actually vicariously experience "a rush," as in a dopamine rush, that is addictive.  The excitement, the pleasure of seeing people or animals getting smacked or even killed around is culturally sanctioned.  Hence, the huge success of "Men in Black," etc., with their quotient of gun violence.

Other than mothers, very few people seem to worry about the ever increasing levels of  "second-hand violence" that most of us are witness to.

Final Review of Yelp

First of all, "Thank you" to the many kind, decent people who have read my reviews.

That said, I am seriously considering closing my account and encourage others to as well.

It is clear to me that Yelp does not respect users who are independent-minded and unwilling to fit into its "food - booze (drink till you puke) - entertainment" mold.  

A marketplace of ideas does exist.  Yelp is afraid of ideas.  It is the status quo:  Consume!  Consume!  Consume!   It is also a clever way for the CEO to earn untold millions--and for the Yelp "Elite," aka the PC Vice Squad, to party all night on the crumbs.  10,000's of writers and 99% get $0.  A gigantic legal marketing scam.

Yelp does not tolerate diversity.  It promotes group think.  And it waves "violations of the TOS (Terms of Service)," without specifying which ones, in order to retaliate against those who criticize its soulless greed, Byzantine secrecy, Kafka-esque arbitrariness, and its double, nay, quadruple standards.

For the past 10 days, every other day I have had at least one review removed, including ones 3 years old.  A few people have been stalking me, rummaging through my past reviews, warning me not to post new reviews, and harassing me in "Talk."

(I like the way Yelp tells you your review has been deleted.  When you try to reply, "noreply@yelp.com" pops up).

In fact, Yelp allows its "Elite," some of whom I unhappily suspect are as semi-literate, to viciously attack and abuse others in its Talk forum:

"I...uh...Think you have issues with being white and are

allowing yourself to become a racist, bigot who is off

her fucking rocker. Take your meds or whatever you need

to do to stop blaming other people for your insecurities."

and

"I don't think you all understand, SHE's the minority here

being treated unfairly. She's clueless and playing the

victim card. I do take pleasure in showing people how

stupid they are. And if you think you've been "beaten

down" with words, grow the fuck up and look what you

write."

and

"
The whole 'it's not me it's ALL IF YOU' stance is both

lazy and delusional."

"I'm still not quite sure whether you're a troll, a

nutter, or some combination of the two."

It takes courage to smack someone when you're 1, they(the Yelp command corps) are 10.

I felt as if I had been gang-banged, which makes sense considering who and what these people idolize and imitate.

Yelp condones cyber-bullying.  Someone well placed warned me "they will now go after you."

* * * * *

I question the integrity of these Yelp Elite.  One comment, since removed, about "nailing [me, my reviews] to trees," was chilling.

There was an element of glee on their part--as if they had seen "Carrie" way too many times. Jeering at others is cheap fun.

These are the actions of childhood cowards who grew up to become, sexually speaking, adults.

As a child, after being beaten up for the upteenth time, I resolved to stand up to bullies. Telling the truth makes me stronger, not weaker.

As a person of color who lived through the '60's Civil Rights movement and was beaten up repeatedly by African-Americans and has been called racial slurs by both whites and blacks, I don't need a bunch of spoiled, ignorant white kids to tell me what racism is and how it feels.

It is not delusional to have deep memories embedded of fists punching and legs kicking you in your face, stomach, chest, side, back.

The hate they felt reading my reviews is their own.

I was forthright with my frustration at the hypocrisy and cowardice of government, civic organizations, and media to acknowledge rampant crime and other destructive behaviors among urban blacks and at the lame rationalizations ("racism").   I spoke of my own personal experience.

My reviews must have elicited something deep inside them that they could not accept.

The people who call others "racist bigots" are often the most bigoted of all.

* How dare I be so racist to tell the truth?


* * * * *

The reason given for the removal of my reviews was:  "not a primary consumer experience."   As if the marketplace of ideas--and we ultimately "buy" them through advertising and taxes--did not exist.

The reviews--which I worked many hours to write--are lost forever, as the Yelp "support" team deleted them forever.   (It is the user's content, but unless one knows that Yelp is about to delete a review, the user has no idea that s/he must immediately go to the site to save a copy).

* * * * *

James Paroline, Danny Vega, Tuba Man, Manish Melwani, you did not die in vain.  We have shown the cowardice--we could not find the conscience--of this city.

Oh, sorry, Yelp, I  digressed and philosophized.  Not part of "the primary consumer experience."

Let's hope that someone else comes up with a better vision of a review site "by and for" ordinary citizens.


* Speaking of which, more threats, physical or otherwise, could be grounds for legal action.

Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum

Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum
Categories: Museums, Art Galleries
7/4/2009 5 photos
For many of us, the closest we will ever get to being inside an Italian Renaissance palazzo will be the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, with the unworldly beauty of its inner courtyard, fin-de-siecle ambiance (Whistler, Sargent, Berenson), and both quality and breadth of its collection of European painting.

The building's facade itself is relatively nondescript, but at least the contrast between the architecture and the collection is not as harsh, let's say, as that of the National Gallery in D.C.

Even shorn of its Rembrandt and Vermeer (from the 1990 heist), the Gardner is peerless if only due to the its similitude to an actual residence rather than an "institution," which will change with the advent of a new building addition by Renzo Piano in 2010.

The first Titian I ever saw was here--the famed "{Rape of] Europa," of which I had seen countless reproductions in books before. The scene--a close-up of Europa supine on the back of an enormous bull--was bathed in the most sublime Venetian colors--sapphire blue, rosy salmon, fleecy whites, and warm orange, and lagoon-deep greens.

Tucked away along one wall (in the "Spanish cloister") was Sargent's "El Jaleo," with its sulfurous dramatic intensity , stark chiaroscuro, reduced palette, and virtuoso brushwork.

And not far away, in the spirit of harmonious eclecticism, a Song dynasty wood Guanyin, the bodhisatta (also known in China as the "goddess of mercy").

With a strong whiff of Orientalism, Whistler's impressionistic "Nocturne in Blue and Silver/Battersea Ranch," hangs in the Yellow Room on the first floor.

Definitely worth a trip to again on my next visit to Boston. (On the West Coast, where I live, anything pre-World War II is considered ancient).

A list of artists and their works at the Gardner:
http://www.gardnermuse...

Compassion & Choices

Compassion & Choices
Category: Community Service/Non-Profit
Neighborhood: Downtown
Update - 1/2/2010 3 photos
"'The continuous torment of the leaking bag, the over active fistula, the hours spent lying flat in bed waiting for the nurse...the anxiety when a visitor comes that the leak should happen, awakening at night to find it has burst, wearing a dress I love and the fistula staining it, getting up two or three times a night to empty the bag...the saddest of those hours spent waiting for the nurse. When the bag leaks I have to take it off and lie flat in bed with wash rags to sponge off the horrible content of the fistula. The hole is deep, the discharge ugly, green, yellow. I often weep.'

Even the slightest movement was enough to dislodge the bag and send the acidic discharge spewing across her abdomen. Within a very short time, the skin around the opening was raw and abraded, prone to infection. When the discharge touched it, as it did all too frequently, the pain was searing.

...

Anais grew steadily weaker throughout December 1976, but Rupert continued to care for her until her lungs filled with fluid and she went into a coma...Her death certificate listed as causes cardiorespiratory arrest, severe malnutrition, and widespread metastatic carcinoma."

-from Anais Nin, A Biography (Putnam, 1995) by Deirdre Bair, pp.506, 514.

Torture of prisoners of war is widely outlawed according to the Geneva and other international Conventions...yet tolerated when it concerns the elderly, the frailest, the most vulnerable: the dying.

Compassion in Dying continues to educate the public across this country, in the face of societal ignorance, religious superstition (mainly the Catholic Church), and institutional inertia.
Edit Remove
People thought this was:Cool (1)
4 Previous Reviews: Hide »
11/29/2009
The national disgrace:

http://www.cbsnew...

We as individuals will all suffer for it. The nation pays for it.

It is neither compassionate nor humane how we treat the dying.

Edit Remove
People thought this was:Cool (1)
12/21/2008
Thank you to everyone who read my review(s), whether you agreed with me or not.

I-1000 passed by a wide margin due to the honesty, openness, and courage of people in this state.

Compassion In Dying helped me greatly to better confront and understand a universal human situation.

The work is not done, of course.

But we have helped break through the pervasive denial--of both death and the right to a peaceful death--in society. And in doing so, I believe we have made life that more precious.

I urge everyone to prepare an Advanced Directive as well as a POLST form with their physician. Compassion in Dying can provide you with these forms.

In addition, I recommend the following books or DVD's (not an inclusive list, by any means). All can be found at the Seattle Public Library:

Peaceful Dying: The Step-by-Step Guide to Preserving Your Dignity, Your Choice, and Your Inner Peace at the End of Life, by Daniel Tobin, M.D.

Healing into Life and Death, Stephen Levine
Who Dies?: An Investigation of Conscious Living and Conscious Dying, Stephen Levine

The Orphaned Adult, Alexander Levy

My Mother Dying, by Hillary Johnson

Caring for Your Parents, WGBH (DVD)

Fatherless Sons: Healing the Legacy of Loss. Jonathan Diamond.

Power of Forgiveness, directed by Martin Doblmeier (DVD)

Edit Remove
People thought this was:Useful (2)Cool (1)
10/6/2008
Go gently into the night...a parent, sibling, partner, spouse, friend.

Let us allow their final wishes to be respected. Dying is hard enough. Don't make it torture.

On November 4, we in Washington State will have the opportunity, thanks to Compassion and Choices (the new name of this organization) to become the second state in the country to pass into law a bill which will give to patients with a diagnosis of a terminal illness the right to chose to die with dignity and in peace.

This is a basic human right. It ought not to be in the hands of state or church to decide.

Oregon became the first state to approve such legislation. Its success has made it both a trail-blazer and a model for other states.

Please support I-1000. Former Governor Booth Gardner (who has Parkinson's disease), one of the principal backers, spoke movingly at the annual meeting in October of his "final campaign." Former Governors Gary Locke and Daniel Evans as well as the Seattle Times, among others, have endorsed I-1000.

The main opponent is (the political arm of) the Catholic Church. Sixteen years ago they defeated the first attempt (I-119) at passage of such legislation.

The mark of a civilized society is the compassion and understanding it extends to all of us at the end of our lives: the right to determine when, where, how, and with whom we share our last moments.

Compassion and Choices has helped made me aware of the value of living life with awareness. To that end, it provides case management to the terminally ill as well as advance directive packets to those interested.

There are no fees for its services.

The work is done overwhelmingly by volunteers, with a paid staff of three persons. The board of directors includes doctors, city attorney, a social worker, health care administrator, minister, psychologist, and a public advocate.

http://www.yeson1...
http://www.yeson1...

http://slog.thest...

http://www.candco...

Edit Remove
People thought this was:Useful (2)Cool (3)
6/29/2007First to Review
After the shocking legal battle, with its attendant intervention by both G.W. and Jeb Bush, over the respective rights of Terri Schiavo's parents and her husband to determine whether or not the woman, who had been in persistent vegetative state for years, could die with dignity (have her feeding tube removed), the right for the terminally ill to make a decision to end their suffering bounced onto the nation's headlines.

The lead lawyer for the husband came to speak to this chapter of the national organization a year or so after the husband won. IThis year former Oregon Governor Barbara Roberts, who spearheaded the enactment of "Death with Dignity" into law in that state (the ONLY state to have such a law), spoke at the annual meeting.

Roberts has written that our society has kept death issues in a closet. We're unwilling to use the ``die'' word; we keep patients hooked up to cold tubes and respirators and heart monitors when ``what a dying person needs is comfort, closeness, dignity, and in some cases, pain control.''

http://www.msnbc....

In 2002, the Bush administration (under AG Ashcroft) attempted to overturn his law, the first in the nation but was unsuccessful.

See http://www.statel...

The state chapter is gearing up to put an initiative on the ballot in Washington State in 2008 that would allow physician-hastened death for the terminally ill, i.e., give these patients the right to choose how and when they exit. It has the support of former Washington governor Booth Gardner and others.

A small organization with a very very important purpose: the right to choose how one die: a natural death or prolonged suffering, not to be confused with euthanasia.
.
Sponsors an annual keynote speaker, aids others in preparing advance (medical) directives as well a the Washington State POLST (Physicians Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment) form, as well as provides counseling and hospice referrals.

Brings attention to topics that many if not Americans would rather not hear about it at all. We all know it's more interesting to watch "American Idol" or "Survivor." But...

...it's a matter of life and death, your own and that of your loved ones.

You would probably end your dying pet's suffering, wouldn't you, instead of prolonging it.

This organization needs and deserves everyone's support. Most of the work is done by volunteers, apart from the staff of three.

Some indication of the difficulty of passing legislation here in Washington state--it' was the Catholic Church that spearheaded the effort to defeat a previous initiative (in 1991) at is to be found in an outstanding recent (12/02/07) cover story of the New York Times magazine:

http://www.nytime...

Edit Remove
People thought this was:

Seattle Times

I've been waiting in vain decades for this newspaper to close.

So stuck in its ways, even if it is locally owned.

Why is it, for instance, that the Seattle Times has had one daily regular African-American columnist (Jerry Large) for two decades but no Asian-American, Hispanic-American, Native American, etc. writer on their staff? Seattle is 11% black AND 11% Asian. And of course Latinos are "burgeoning"...

On the editorial page, op-eds by Leonard Pitts and Lynne Varner are regularly published--but barely a peep from other minorities.

How can the Times in good conscience allow Jerry Large to opine on how America must deal with its fear of young black men when it published a few years ago a story on how a group of young blacks (Gates scholarship honorees!) in Tacoma

"... surrounded ...'H' [a Vietnamese Buddhist and nuclear physicist engaged to be married] outside his home, beat him with a hammer when he tried to run away, then robbed him...[he] spent his last conscious moments on his doorstep, his skull fractured by blows from the hammer."

http://seattletim...
http://seattletim...

The murderer's family and friends could not believe he did it ("This is not the same person we know").

Did the three men involved inexplicably have their minds hijacked by "the Evil One" that day? Or were they "a few bad apples among an otherwise bumper crop"?

And let's not forget the teens who beat to death Danny Vega in the Rainier Valley and Tuba Man just outside the Seattle Center. Or the young guy who sucker-punched James Paroline ("the traffic circle gardener") so hard the guy's head hit the pavement, fracturing his skull.

The killers were the products of a culture. They were not isolated incidents.

* * * * *

Or St. Patrick's Day 2012 a tourist in downtown Baltimore was punched, stripped, and robbed:

http://www.youtub...

The crowd egged the attackers on; they bragged about and filmed it. If it had been white-on-black, it would have provoked an unending parade of national protests, analysis, and editorials.

I do not condemn entire groups of people. I am critical of patterns of behaviors and attitudes. And I think the Seattle Times has been intentionally turning a blind eye to certain violent crimes instead of fully reporting them.

(I hope Korean-Americans would want to reflect on mental health issues within their community as well as whatever common links that the mass killings at Virginia Tech and in Oakland might have).

* * * * *

The Seattle Times once had a semi-regular Asian writer, one with a weird ("Hsing Chou...") name,* who was consigned to writing about cuisine and local restaurants. That's right, all that's Asian--forget about the importance of Chinese exports and imports to and from the Pacific Northwest--can be resumed in "spicy pork fried rice" and "fortune cookies." Back to the kitchen again, you chopstick-lovin' Orientals.

As for Hispanics having an opinion, aren't they busy now with all those new food trucks?

Really, Seattle Times!

* Thus perpetuating the stereotype that Asian-Americans are "exotic" foreigners.

All we really know about them is (1) they like to cook and (2) we like them to cook (for us)! But can they really write?

* * * * *

Someday I hope that from within the African-American community itself there will be a million-man protest against violence, not against white racism but against the violence prevalent within that same community.

93% of murders of African-Americans are committed by African-Americans.

African-Americans don't need white people to solve this problem.

They must and can do it by themselves.

How? In my opinion, by denouncing against the glorification of violence, countering the leniency with which they hold their own children accountable for their actions, as well as the relentless hyper-macho identity ingrained from an early age in the minds of susceptible children, and by finding better role models than star athletes, celebrities, etc.

I'm not sure how becoming teary-eyed watching "The Help" or indignant re-reading Eldridge Cleaver exactly addresses the problem of urban violence, much less helps to reduce it.

The enemy, as is so often the case, within, not outside of ourselves.

Pride goeth before a fall.

* * * * *

My review does not make me "a racist troll." (I thought trolls were found only in Scandinavia. It takes a troll to know one). Some people use "racist" and "troll" to smear another and silence discussion. They should look up the definition of "racism" in a dictionary.

I believe I am acting as a responsible citizen (and "consumer of ideas," how ecologically sound!).

Edit Remove
People thought this was:Useful (1)Funny (2)
4/21/2010
The wrong newspaper closed.

(Though the Seattle P.I. had its shortcomings, I preferred reading it over the Times).

I was once, a long time ago, seduced by the sheer bulk of the Times, but I switched over to the P.I. when the Blethren family, owners of the Times, supported George W. Bush in 2000--just because they vehemently opposed the capital gains tax.

And resorting to calling Mayor McGinn a "ventriloquist" in a shrill editorial smacks more of an ad hominem attack than anything else (the Times vehmently supported Mallhan).

http://seattletim...

Anyway, the fact that there appeared to be have news--a thicker newspaper compared to the P.I.--was simply a function of it having more advertising. Lots more.

The news reporting was slim and not up to the quality of the P.I. Much of what does not make into the Seattle Times is picked up in the Seattle Weekly, the Stranger, or the local community newspapers.

It's nice, that in the age of Obama, and we're supposedly more open to talking about race issues, the Seattle Times bows to prudery and refuses to disclose such "details" in cases of violent crime.

Also, nothing like censorship*:

http://seattletim......

Without a description of the criminals (stats including race, ethnicity, height, build, age, clothing, etc.), how are people supposed to identify and/or avoid being victims? *This has apparently changed in recent months.

Edit Remove
People thought this was:

Monorail

Seattle Center Monorail
Category: Public Transportation
Neighborhood: Queen Anne
7/3/2007
A joke...a hideous remnant of the World's Fair of 1962, massive concrete, clumsy, obstructing Fifth Avenue (west of Pine St.) and with its sheer bulk throwing the otherwise pleasant street into deep shadow.

Tear it down, please, ASAP.

It goes nowhere. Why would anyone, including a tourist, want to wait half an hour in line to take something that goes 1/2 mile??

If it's meant to show how benighted our sense of urban aesthetics is, then it's a winner. Furthermore, it is NOT a technological cutting marvel (not since 1962) and has been superseded around the world.

KCTS

KCTS Seattle
Category: Television Stations
Neighborhood: Queen Anne
Update - 4/12/2009
* * * * (1/2) *

"When people are young, they want to live forever. But that's also the greatest fear of the elderly--many don't want to live forever.

"60% of those over 85 will enter a nursing home. If they stay there longer than 6 months the vast majority will stay there until the end of their lives.

...Some people will thrive there."

--from the Frontline series video "Living Old" on the http://kcts.org website. A spectacularly eye-opening, moving 2006 documentary.

http://www.pbs.org/wgb...

I do understand the haphazardness of their scheduling can make it difficult for viewers.

Many, many videos can be seen in their entirety there. So if you miss a program, at least try to see if it is there.

Though dismayed by the fact that public television in this country has become dependent on corporate support--the federal government deeming it not a priority to support--, I am amazed at the quality of the programming of public television.

In a society consumed by consumerism and other forms of escapism, I am extremely grateful to KCTS, our local public television station, PBS affiliate.

No, Google-ling for information on aging--for baby-boomers with parents whose health is on a rather downward decline--will not yield the kind of first-hand testimony and comprehensive coverage of topics like aging, the economy, arts, education.

I only wish children at a young age were exposed to and even "raised on" KCTS and PBS.

America the way it is, not the way it would like to see itself.
Edit Remove
1 Previous Review: Hide »
9/28/2007
There may be hundreds of cable televisions channels these days to choose from, but there's one local channel, Channel 9, that largely outshines all the others--and you don't even need to sign up with Comcast or Millenium cable. A pair of "rabbit ears" will do.

KCTS is an incredible boon to local television watchers simply by dint of being an affiliate of PBS. Just viewing the News Hours with Jim Lehrer in the past few days regarding the turbulent events in Myanmar, compared to the skimpy, condensed coverage on the major networks was astonishing.

Or the David Brooks/Mark Shields responses to the $35 billion program that will be passed soon by both Houses to expand health insurance for children in the U.S. that Bush, in a seventh-year-of-his term death conversion, promises to veto in the name of fiscal responsibility/balan cing the budget.

I'll have to admit that both the New York Times and http://salon.com are pretty good written-word complements to the nightly 6:00 pm news-of-the-day coverage here.

Intelligent, informative, challenging, balanced, relevant...and not ideological (not easily pigeon-holed as either "liberal" or "conservative").

I don't enjoy some of the programming on KCTS (love Wordsworth but am not found of Masterpiece Theater, while Suzie Orman and Wayne Dyer leave me cold), but compared to commercial television, despite the plethora of new cable stations, this is no contest whatsoever. This, despite, the increasing reliance on corporate sponsorship (relatively benign "advertising").

The programs on history (Ken Burns, etc.), American Playhouse, the Charlie Rose (with his almost always interesting guests) Show, Frontline, and the Rick Steves travelogues are very good.

The full-length movie shown on Friday evening--wtihout commercial interruption-is always an interesting choice. Recently, for instance, I happen to turn to channel 9 and catch David Lean's ca. 1942 film version of Dickens's "Great Expectations"--far from standard Hollywood fare that CBS, ABC, NBC show.

Part of my not watching KCTS often enough is, actually, due to my not having a TV Guide around handy! (You can get a weekly schedule ahead of time by getting yourself on their email list, go to http://www.kcts.org).

It is simply an attempt to reach as broad an audience as possible, vital in this day of cutbacks on federal funding of quality programming of any kind.

Puts to shame the Bush Administration's shameless funding of a now four-year-old war that has drained close to half a trillion dollars and caused nothing but destruction, death, and disorder halfway around the world.

If only more people would watch public television of any kind, abject stupidity on the scale of re-electing GWB in 2004 on the basis of "security" ("Did, or did not, Iraq have anything to do with 9/11?") would not been so generously displayed to the world .

As mentioned earlier, it doesn't depend of fancy technology...just basic skills of reasoning and being able to listen to more than just sound-bites...and maybe turning off your cell-phone for 30 minutes.

Edit Remove
People thought this was: